I didn’t realize what I was missing.

I’ve been watching too many YouTube videos lately because now I’m starting to write “clickbait” and very uninformative titles for my blog posts. I apologize. I didn’t really know what else to call it – a soul chat, thinking out loud, work updates, recent motivation. All are applicable, so of course I’m linking up with Amanda at Running with Spoons for Thinking Out Loud Thursday #106.

A bit of context would be handy. I started my current job fresh out of graduate school in September. I joined a great team of people in a health policy capacity here in Edmonton and I’ve been kind of finding my way for the last 8 months. I’ve gone from days of coming home wanting to cry and searching job postings elsewhere to days where I feel like I’m in exactly the right place I need to be and feeling inspired and elated to be able to work in the position I do. About two months ago we had a reorganization and I was moved to a new team. It’s been a little unguided from higher up and we’ve been left to figure out our mandate, direction, and workload. I am pretty good at dealing with change, because in my mind, it’s an opportunity and there is a reason it was meant to happen. THIS IS ONE OF THOSE INSTANCES.

Jo (Living Mint Green) has always told me… and the world… to ask for what you want. Tell yourself, the Universe, and those who will listen, what you want and how you can be supported to get there. ‘Ask and ye shall receive’ sort of deal. I received that very same message in what I can only describe as one of the best meetings I’ve ever had with a supervisor in my entire life. My job shift to be in a new area meant I would be working under a new supervisor. I honestly didn’t realize what I was missing until I had a one-on-one meeting yesterday with my new supervisor.

It was one the most raw, motivating, soul-searching meetings I’ve had in a while, and it felt great. I texted my dad after and he said, “Are you being sarcastic or was it actually that good?” I had to laugh because a few months ago it probably WOULD have been sarcastic, but it was ACTUALLY that good. I didn’t know I was missing this professional supportive figure. Someone who was on my team, but would be there to challenge me. I thrive on bettering myself, finding a goal and crushing it, and outlining where I want to go and how I’m going to get there. My supervisor tapped into that by just asking me questions that were simple, yet deep. They were easy to answer, just sometimes the articulation needed to be dug up from my heart and soul where I’d started to keep some of my hopes and dreams buried.

I came from a place of feeling a bit disempowered and lost to a place of better clarity. I was pushed to be honest and answer what I truly felt my life would look like as I grew my career, became the person I wanted to become, and let dreams unfold that I might currently be doubtful about. Ask and ye shall receive… or something. He made a point of saying that if I’m not open and real about what I want to do and where I want to go, he can’t help me get there. We talked about lots of different options and how where I am now can be shaped as an opportunity to get me where I want to go. He said he had just come from lunch with a friend who is a heart surgeon. The heart surgeon said that when he thought about going into heart surgery, he was terrified of the 12 years it takes to get there. Now, more than that time later, he says he’s realized that 12 years was going to go by no matter what, so why not use that time to follow your dreams and do something you are passionate about.

Isn’t it crazy how one voice can enter your life at just the right time and provide exactly what you need. I guess it’s true… ask and ye shall receive. I didn’t really know how much I was missing that guidance until it found me. I guess one of the major thoughts that I left that meeting with was to reflect on what I want for my life, and let it happen. It takes obvious hard work, commitment, and passion, but it also takes things that are external to you and for those things to align, you have to ask for them. Support, guidance, opportunity… those can’t be done by yourself.

Thanks for listening, uh reading… I hope you are having an amazing week and you have a even better weekend. Happy Easter! I’ll catch up with you next week after my lovely 4-day weekend!

What are you doing for Easter?

Do you have any Easter traditions?

Have you had an aha moment recently? Tell me about it!

4 Comments

  1. Such a great post! What an awesome meeting and boss!! It’s so important to feel excited about our job and what we do each day.

  2. Kris! I love this story. Once we get clear on what we want, don’t you love how things just click? I too, was feeling stagnant/uncertain/uninspired in my job (and I wasn’t the only one). My new boss called me out on it. He said I was giving the impression I wasn’t engaged (and I wasn’t) so I told him why + what I wanted and they gave it to me. Hahaha
    Our lives are a reflection of our dominant thoughts, so we might as well think about the things we’d like to achieve rather than believing all the small/scary/limiting thoughts that enter our minds (and ultimately become our lives if we let it).

    Have a great weekend! Don’t die of a chocolate egg OD like I plan on doing.

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